Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Ford Nation, What is Wrong with YOU?! An Angry Torontonian's Rant.

Ok, before I begin, you need to know that I didn't always hate Rob Ford. In fact when he was running for mayor, not only did I keep an open mind, I actually hosted a town-hall for him in my home. I have to admit, though, by the end of that meeting, between his erratic, overly-sweaty demeanor and his utter disinterest in revitalizing the waterfront-which in my opinion is an important factor in improving our city from both a fiscal and cultural perspective-I really wasn't sure I wanted him for my mayor.

I've tried to keep my mouth shut about this whole deal with Rob Ford, convinced that you, the citizens of Ford Nation, would eventually come to your senses.

According to the latest polls, this does not seem to be happening.

So please do me a favour and read my top 10 reasons why you must not vote for Rob Ford in the next election. I must stress that these are not the only reasons, merely the top 10. I also need to stress that if I could get him out of office today, I would. But I can't. All I can do is plant a seed in your brainwashed minds that hopefully grows into enough doubt that come next election, you do the right thing.

But before I get started, I need to point out the one reason that should have nothing to do with his re-election: his addiction problems. There is no doubt that Rob Ford has a very serious drug, alcohol, and food addiction. And for that, we need to have sympathy for him. Addiction is an illness that unfortunately is fueled quite a bit by stress, denial and enablers, all of which he is currently being bombarded by. For his own health and welfare, he needs to get help.  For the sake of his wife, children, and other family members who are slowly being destroyed by his addiction, he needs to get help.

Anyone who knows anything about drug and alcohol addiction knows these three things:

1. You can't even begin to get better until you admit to yourself that your problem is out of control, that you need help.
2. Crack-cocaine is not a gateway drug; it is the end-destination for every other gateway drug. Nobody starts off using crack; they progress to it. So if you think his one "mistake" is a one-time mistake, you're fooling yourself. Even if this was the one time he did crack, which is quite unlikely, there is no doubt he has done a crapload of other drugs.
3. People who are addicts aren't just lying to themselves, they're lying to everyone. And they'll keep lying even after they're caught...over and over again. Why? Because when you're an addict, nothing else matter except feeding your addiction. Not your family, not your co-workers, and certainly not the millions of citizens of the largest and arguably most influential city in Canada.

This is why if you truly love Rob Ford as much as you all say you do, stop enabling him. Stop telling him he's doing an awesome job. That him high is better than the sober politicians. If you love him and truly care for his well being as a human being, use your fancy billboard money to ask him to get help instead of staying in office. Stop being selfish by asking him to keep helping you and instead, encourage him to help himself.


Even if he does go for help and does become sober (which for his children's sake, I really hope happens) this is why he cannot remain mayor:

1. He is a liar. I can't even begin to list every lie he has told but some of the biggies include (obviously) not smoking crack and saving the city 1 billion dollars. He has not saved the city one billion dollars; he just projected that maybe, if everything goes according to plan over the next decade or so, a billion dollars might be saved. Don't believe me? Check this out this article written before the crack hit the fan.

2. Don't think he's a liar as much as he made a colossal accounting mistake? Ok, let's take that angle. Do you really want to have your city run by a man who is that fiscally illiterate?

3. So now that we agree that his "savings" are less than a billion, I will concede and say he has saved the city some money. But how has that changed your life for the better? Do we now have more money for the things that make an urban centre great? Why were we saving this money? What is the end result we're trying to achieve? Call me ignorant but I don't get it. Social services are down, there are longer wait times for everything, taxes have gone up, the land-transfer tax is still here. Exactly how are we benefitting from the gravy train being stopped?

4. Before you can save money, you need to make money. And Rob Ford has done absolutely nothing constructive to bring money to our city. The Board of Trade, an organization representing over 10 000 businesses and professionals in Toronto, doesn't support him. While he has made some embarrassing half-assed attempts at bringing business to T.dot, include the fiasco in Chicago, there are no concrete projects that he has proposed to elevate Toronto on a world-level. Actually, that's not altogether true. He did had some fantastic ideas for tourism: kick all the residents off of the Islands and turn it into one giant red light district. That way scum from all over the world could come to Toronto and get down with their booze, drugs, and prostitutes instead of the millions of families who want to enjoy the natural beauty of the Islands. That's in addition to the ridiculous Ferris Wheel brother Dougie recommended and he supported. He has done absolutely nothing constructive in strengthening our reputation as a "world-class city." In fact, he's turned us into a "world-class joke."

5. Not only is he failing to help the city earn money, it seems as if he's actively trying to destroy the city. Take our libraries for example; remember this story about when he wanted to close a bunch of them? Libraries house not only books but important programs such as early learning programs for babies, children, and parents, computer and internet usage for those who cannot afford it, support group meetings, help for new immigrants and those seeking employment, and so much more.

6. You know the expression: "where there's smoke, there's fire"? Well Rob Ford is surrounded by more smoke that I've ever seen. In the past two years, he's been involved in no less than a half-dozen major scandals, including commandeering a TTC bus for his football team, abusing his position as mayor by soliciting donations for "his" team using Toronto letterhead, being fired from said team for racist and disparaging remarks, allegedly groping a woman, his admission of robocalls-which is completely unethical, and (my personal favorite) actually being fired for all of his illegal activity and his refusal to accept responsibility for his actions. For a round up of these and other awesome moments in Ford Nation, check out of my all time favorite articles here.

7. Don't care about all that because you still insist it's all about saving money? Have you ever though about how much his antics have cost the city? Try adding up all of the court costs, lawyer fees, and hours and hours wasted debating and discussing his ridiculousness in council when they could've been discussing much more pressing issues. Like how to address public drunkenness.  On second thought, maybe he wanted council to avoid taking about public drunkenness since he's normally the one drunk in public. 

8. His blatant and intensely offensive demeanor towards more than 50 percent of the citizens of our city. That's right, women of Ford Nation, I'm talking to you. He's called us bitches, groped us, gave us the finger, fired every single one of us so that there's isn't a single woman on his executive, and last but not least, had these two women dress up in cabbage bikinis to advertise his weight-loss challenge.
Which he gave up on and failed miserably, BTW. How can you POSSIBLY respect a man who clearly doesn't respect you at all?

9. Today in council, he stated that it essential that he stay in power because he is a role model for underprivileged youth. For me, this is when things get serious. I am not all joking or trying to be funny when I say that it literally scares me to think that he truly believes that he is a good role model for the youth of our city. That children looking up to him may actually think that you can be morbidly obese, be (at the very least) a completely irresponsible abuser of alcohol and drugs, admit to purchasing illegal drugs, and still be successful in life. All you have to do is say, "sorry".

If he's their role model, the youth of today are going to think that there's nothing wrong with treating others with little or no respect; having violent, angry outburst; and cheating, lying, and bullying others in order to get what you want.

I am a teacher and I recognize that in choosing that profession, I have a responsibility to be a positive role model for my students. I am overly-cognizant of my actions and truly try to live a life that promotes respect for myself and others, generosity, and an overall healthy lifestyle. I recognize that the youth of today are our future and if we want them to grow up to be the strong citizens our world needs, it is up to us to model how successful global citizen behave. I can honestly and confidently say that I consistently conduct myself in a manner that deems me a positive role model.

Can Rob Ford say the same? Do you want you children growing up to be just like Rob Ford?

10. And my personal favorite: the reason I didn't vote for Rob Ford in the first place. Years ago, when he was running for mayor, a couple citizens complained to him that the traffic caused by the Toronto Marathon was "very inconvenient" and something needed to be done about it. Without skipping a beat, Mr. Ford agreed with the voters and proposed moving the marathon from city streets to park trails. Forget about the millions and millions of tourism dollars the marathon brings to Toronto; what he was proposing was just...stupid. He wanted these 20 000+ runners
to squeeze onto this tiny little pathway
And anyone who doesn't understand why that just isn't feasible has no business running the greatest city in the world.
Great citizens of Toronto, I can't be the only one out there who feels this way, who's this angry. Please help me out in convincing the citizens of Ford Nation that it's time to emigrate. Please spread the word and in the space below, state your own reasons why we cannot let this man run our city anymore.
Disclaimer: the remarks below were written during a time when I was in an angry stupor. I cannot be held responsible for my poor judgment in regards to my use of grammar and punctuation.


  1. Brilliant piece, Cayla. My favourite paragraph begins with the sentence "I am a teacher and I recognize that in choosing that profession, I have a responsibility to be a positive role model for my students.".Bravo! Bravo! Bravo!